Rules when calling tech support

If you have to call tech support, please please use the following rules when calling. It will save both of us pain, suffering, etc.

1. If you are going to call on a cell phone, please make sure you are in a good calling area and have a nice clear line. When in doubt, call on a landline, I do not want to have to yell my answer over your static.

2. If you absolutely must call on a cell phone, have patience with me. I can't understand you and you yelling into the phone is not going to help with your crappy service. Its like speaking louder to someone who doesn't understand English. That isn't going to help them learn, its just going to scare them.

3. If I tell you something is against our policy, you are not entitled to it or have not purchased it from us, don't expect me to *be nice* and help you out of the kindness of my heart. While I am wasting time with you, I could be helping paying customers.

4. If you are denied support, don't be a dick.